It’s been a difficult decision, but today I resigned from my role as the General Manager of the FC and Headmistress of the Absolute Dance Academy.
I’ve been inundated with IMs asking me why – and I appreciate your concern so much. I’d be happy to talk to you any of you about it and to make clear that I did not leave you, I left a situation that became impossible to accept. Also, I wanted to share my reasons here so that I wasn’t the source of chinese whispers.
My decision to leave was not considered lightly. I had much to lose. But, one thing I won’t betray are my standards, values or principles, and to remain at the FC as the general manager was becoming tantamount to doing so.
The problem is mainly rooted with one individual: EmmaJaneKnight (I initially didn’t put this name in here, but I’ve realised that has led to a guessing game that can’t be healthy, so there it is).
About a month ago, I reluctantly took on the Gemz, our dancer-staff, as part of my team under the understanding that they would actually be my reports. It was promised to me, that should they breach their commitments, there would be consequences that I could execute.
The fact is, I’ve been harrassed by Emma pretty much ever since. I have given her hours and hours of my time and attention. I have listened to all of her complaints about everyone under the sun, complaints about guests, dancers, and team members. I have bent over backwards to accommodate her. I have dealt, politely and with respect, with all of her threats, sarcasm, whining, objections, stonewalls, and games. Worst of all, all of this time and energy has sucked out the time and energy I could have been spending do my real task, which was to grow a successful Second Life Club.
For me, time is my most valuable asset, and when it is squandered in the fruitless pursuit of dealing with constant drama, calulations are made, and you realise that it’s just not worth the stress, time and effort anymore.
Finally, the camel’s back broke when she chose to insult me while protesting my choice to appoint a new Officer for club that she had a personal problem with. She called me a bitch and a coward. This isn’t new, as she has a pattern of insults and negativity that is unrelenting.
One of the things I thought we held dear, was our pledge to respect each other, even when we disagree.
Alone, this would be a minor bruise – but it follows a pattern of abuse that I was no longer prepared to accept. What’s worse is that when I chose to remove her, I did not receive the support of the owner of the FC. Simply put, he refused.
I don’t think he intended to, but the fact remains, he reneged on his commitment. And, even after a lengthy conversation, he chose to not see it my way.
I know it’s hard being an owner, and I don’t have anything against Homens personally. But an commitment is a commitment.
In fact, I’m very grateful for the opportunity he gave me to do take on this project. Of course, I wish him all the success in the future in spite of our disagreement.
When you are working towards a common cause, you have to trust the people you rely on to have your back. I lost that trust today. I hold no grudges, but I am very disappointed.
I’m happy, however, with what I accomplished in less than 3 months:
- Initiating a weekly meeting habit complete with agendas and minutes
- Building the ADA program and website, and helping teach over 50 dancers
- Building the FC website
- Rewriting all the Job Descriptions
- Rewriting the Club Rules
- Building a team by hiring 1 Gem and 3 Officers
- Initiating the Exotic Dancer group
- Organising the move of all dancers over to a new Group
- Launching the Dancer + Program
- Planning an Events Calendar
- Growing the club sales by 150% enabling it to start paying it’s bills without incurring huge losses
- And many other programs in the works, which I hope come to fruition
What I will miss the most is working with my team.
Thank you to my Team: Allure Moonstone, Arwan Skeldergate, Chantel Mynx, Isadora Corral, Nala Datura, and Purdie Silkamour. I will never forget your support, your help, and your guidance during my term. I appreciate all of your efforts and your loyalty.
Thank you to Katerina Moon, who I was looking forward to work with very much.
Thank you to all the 10 Dancer +: who took a chance on my program with the hopes of engaging in some healthy competition in the pursuit of fun and rewards. I knew you had it in you to do your best, and I so wanted to help encourage and reward you.
Thank you to all the over 150 Dancers and Bartenders at the Club: you are a constant source of entertainment, friendship and comraderie. Thank you to my lovely Exotics, for whom I worked hard to include as vital members of the club, in spite of your challenges with english.
Thank you to the over 50 ADA students: I had so much fun with you I looked forward to every single class.
Thank you to all of the hundreds of Guests: the old and the new, for spending your time and sharing your kindness with us at the FC, and helping me feel like this work had a purpose.
I love you all.
I think it was a hard decision for you…but you do right.
You’re so right, Pepper. I woke up this morning thinking – YES! I did the right thing! And that is a great sign. No regrets. A super learning experience – and the next adventure begins today!
This sounds like a job i had irl – you did right. Its not worth it. Drama drains our energy. If boss dont listen just move on. And its their loss, god, 250% increase? Jeezz i hope they payed you enough! Hugsss
Thank you for your support, Mera. And, how lovely it was to meet you last night! I did all my work for the club on a 100% commission basis, so yes, I feel my compensation was fair. But even more importantly, the education I’ve received as a result of this experience, and the opportunity I’ved had to gain the trust of some amazing team members, is the most valuable thing I got out of it!
Good to hear! Yes it was great to meet, have a lovely weekend now
Becks
Everyone who knows you, knows what a great job you did at the FC. The amount of unpaid hours you put in, the way you dealt with the drama and unnecessary conflict that seemed to come mostly from one person, the professionalism you brought to the management of the club, the ideas you generated and the amount of income you brought into the club through the coaching and development of the staff.
What people do not know about – up until now – are the battles that you had with certain people – ie Emma who has her own agenda. She told you on day one that she wanted your job and that is what she has been gunning for ever since. So – now she gets her chance……and good luck to her and Homens.
I agree – I have no personal grudges against Homens. I quit the FC and the ADA because my loyalty is to you – as my manager and as my friend.
Funny enough – I had a similar situation occur in RL once. My manager left the shop we worked in and went to another store. Within a day of her leaving – ALL 10 of her staff left. One by one – she hired us at the new store. The store we left closed within a month. I am still really good frinds with that manager. In fact- she worked for me for a bit last year.
Now of course, the FC won’t close. It will go back to what it was before you were appointed as Manager- chaotic, full of drama and bitchiness and complaints, lack- lustre emoting for the most part and some odd practices – dancers who escort (even though it is against the rules) and take money from guests privately (even though it is against the rules).
Just one thing I would like to point out about the ADA. As you know Becky – the plan that we had for the ADA was tied in with the Dancer + programme. Originally, only graduates of the ADA were going to be given the Dancer + tag. That was the plan. That was going to be their reward and a quality control for the club.
Then- randomly one day – without any consultation – Homens decided to award Dancer + tags to certain dancers. If anyone questions why attendance dropped off at the ADA classes – I reckon the reason is right there. Homens took away the reward.
In truth, I knew at that point that the ADA was never going to be what we set it out to be. As one dancer said to me when I asked her why she stopped coming to the classes- “Oh – I love your classes Purdie – they are so interesting and fun. But I have got my Dancer + tag now – so why should I bother?”
And it was at that point that I knew – right there – that I couldn’t work for an owner who couldn’t logically think through and stick to a well thought out plan, who acted spontaneously, without consultation and as a consequence – jeopardised all the hard work and long (unpaid for) hours that you and I had put in to developing the course. But – we both saw it through and delivered our commitment. It is a shame that the man who was paying for our time for delivering the course – actually jeopardised the attendance himself – and what’s more – he probably doesn’t even realise that it was actually down to him! He probably thought it was our fault somehow! Ironic – when you read the positive feedback we had from the dancers who attended.
So – my love….onward and upwards……as someone said to me tonight (one of the FC dancers) “You two are so far above that place – I am surprised it took you that long to leave.”
The future looks bright. And you know……
“If I could, then I would
I’ll go wherever you will go
Way up high or down low
I’ll go wherever you will go ”
And…I bet I won’t be the only one.
xoxoxxoxoxoxoxo
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